gloomy

been quite a while since i blog... yes, laziness is an excuse..
as usual, 2008 just zoomed past like nobody's business and nothing had been done during that year...

suddenly feel that growing up is not an easy at all... and i know, it will never be a piece of cake... with a procrastinating me, nothing seems to be a smooth ride... tho the only person who can change all those is me myself and i, i still couldnt be much bother at all.....

everything seems so perfect on the outside, but when peeled open, they are often unspeakable... its ok not to understand what i am talking about, as i dun really know too..
why are we born to worry? worry about career, worry about family & friends, worry about marrying a good husband, worry about what is going to happen to me in the future or maybe i will just be gone tomorrow?...

sometimes, i just wish to disappear... isn't that great if we have that ability to do so?
maybe i should try migrating? get away from all the worries, or unhappiness for awhile is not so bad after all.. like my cousin, who took the courage to move to UK alone to work n study n survive herself... bravo to her!! i dont think i even have the gut to do so..

so in 2009, what should i be expecting?
if im not going to do anything about it, it wouldn't be a difference as 2008 at all....



[moody]